This week’s blog comes from The Car Doctor, Ron Ananian’s blog. I thought it was pretty good, see for yourself!These all start with
"You might be a car nut if..."
1. Buying gas for the car is something similar to a religious event. It has to be purchased not only from the same brand but the SAME station. Higher initiates to the order always use the same pump as well. Deviations can occur but not without separation anxiety.
2. You have given your car a name. Perhaps "Minty" if its green or "Bosco" if you consider it a childhood friend. People that do this are known to pace the waiting room of repair shops as the car is serviced hoping that it pulls through the operation.
3. When you park your vehicle you point it nose out so you can have the quick release of the open road sensation when you start out in the morning. Starting your car in this manner is similar to the Batmobile as the checklist is either verbally or mentally gone through prior to launch. "Power to the batteries, turbines to speed" and all that stuff...
4. Your car is cleaner than your house. And shines brighter than the sun from the wax and polish. You refuse to take it to a car wash except on the coldest days and even then you need to hand dry and talk nice to her since you feel bad for getting "the baby" wet and cold.
5. When you park your car you always take that last spot at the mall WAY over at the FAR side. It takes you 20 minutes to get to the front door of the mall. Higher initiates don't even take their car to the mall, they have a beater (if you're a car nut you know what a beater is) for that. And if you do park your car at the mall it takes you at least 3 attempts to leave her because you have OCD and check the door locks several times. (or is this just me???)
6. You own at least 2 cars that you use yourself. One is the "good" car, the other is the "beater". (see #5 for a better explanation and deeper understanding) that you keep handy to drive just in case it rains OR you have to go to the mall to park.
7. When family and friends talk about storage cases and cabinets for their collectibles (dolls, stamps, etc) you dream of the day you can build a multi level climate controlled parking garage. (attached to the house). When you were a kid collecting Matchbox cars was a passion that you carry with you today but only in full scale.
8. You refuse to remove the paper floor mats from the car after it has been detailed and cleaned until they are almost worn through. You also have purchased 2 sets of floor mats; one for good weather and the other for bad. In either case you may also lay a small rug sample from the local carpet store over the mats to keep them clean forever. Allowing your shoes to actually touch the floor mats is sacrilege and something akin to your parents letting you sit on the plastic covered couch in the living room. You remember being told "Go sit in the family room, the living room is for company only. " (Although you have a hard time remembering company using that room either.)
9. Your idea of a great family vacation is a road trip from any part of the world to Detroit to visit GM, Ford or Chrysler corporate headquarters for the guided tour. If you're lucky you squeeze in a tour of an automobile assembly plant too as a side trip en route. Your family however wants to go somewhere silly like Hawaii or Bermuda.
10. Your #1 mission in life is to keep the memory of the muscle car era alive by petitioning the EPA to do away with CAFE and other fuel economy ratings. You want them to rate cars strictly by horse power and cubic inches (not liters, by the way).
11. Your trunk contains enough emergency equipment to operate a small country or command an armored division. Everything from blankets, food, CB radios, flares and spare batteries are just a sample of what can be found in your trunk. (all neatly stacked and organized by the way). Snow shovels in early spring or late summer are not uncommon just in case you take a trip to the North country and are caught short by an unexpected snow storm or your significant other has to fight off the bears to keep the car safe.
And last, you ARE a car nut if at least 3 or more of the previous 11 statements are applicable to you and yours. You most likely have a few old license plates nailed to the garage at home.
