Dudley was never really sure of himself. He probably should have been an accountant because of his meticulous attention to detail. Perhaps this was because he was always afraid of making a mistake. Dudley would double check every step and recheck his work again and again, just in case he missed something. While he was as slow as molasses on a winter day, he always did the job right the first time and never had any comebacks. The other mechanics had nicknamed him "Dudly Do Right."
Because Dudley was very small and had tiny hands, he became really good at doing dashboard work. The foreman saved all of this type of work for Dudley because he knew that Dudley would be able to snake his little hands up inside the dash with ease and repair many types of problems that required removal of the entire dash. Especially when dealing with dash rattles, Dudley was a champ.
Dash work is a special type of mechanical repair. It really requires a high degree of fastidiousness. Removal and disassembly of the dash is a complicated task involving many small steps. There are a multitude of clips and fasteners involved and if even one is omitted, the dash will buzz or rattle to beat the band. Many dashboards have small pieces of sound deadener affixed to their innermost recesses. Failure to reinstall a small piece of foam in a certain place can result in a squeak or chirping noise that will leave the owner thinking a pack of mice had moved into the instrument panel.
Dudley liked dash work because it was clean work and didn't require a great deal of strength. The only thing he didn't like about it was the sharp edges of the metal panels inside the dash. He often wore multiple bandages on his hands after he finished a job -- from being sliced and diced by a particular job. He had taken to wearing tight-fitting leather cloves to protect his hands.
Dudley liked dash work because it also involved a great deal of expertise in electronics. As cars became more and more sophisticated, he was required to use more and more electronic test equipment in order to find the faulty control module or ambient air temperature sensor. Wiring problems fascinated him and he took a home study course in electronics in order to excel in this new realm of electronics.
Today he was chasing after a problem with a radio antenna that would go up and down by itself. The owner was complaining that the electric antenna seemed to have a mind of its own. He said that it had really embarrassed him recently when he was sitting at a red light and the antenna kept going up and down. A very pretty woman was stopped at the light next to him and saw the antenna doing its thing. She thought he was being crude by making lewd suggestions with the antenna. She even shouted at him, "pervert!" as she roared away from the red light.
Dudley was going to troubleshoot the problem with a test light. But first, he carefully plugged his auxiliary power source into the cigarette lighter to keep the radio powered up. Then he disconnected the car battery and let the car stand for a few minutes in order to deplete the electrical charge from the airbag system. He knew that if he failed to disarm the airbag system, it might deploy unexpectedly. As usual, he was being careful.
Dudley also liked to improvise. He took pride in making special homemade tools. In this case, he was using a tool he called his "power-upper." It consisted of a small motorcycle battery that was connected to a plug that fit the cigarette lighter. When he plugged it into the cigarette lighter, it would provide an alternate source of power for the accessories. This allowed Dudley to do dash work while the vehicle's battery was disconnected.
Now, with his "power-upper" connected to the car and the car battery safely disconnected, Dudley set out to find the intermittent problem with the car antenna. The only problem was, he couldn't see the antenna operate from under the dash. He decided to get the car owner to lend his assistance and watch for the antenna to move as Dudley checked the connections under the dash.
He went to the waiting room and found the owner sitting there eating his lunch.
"Would you please come sit in the car and watch for the antenna to move while I work under the dash?" Dudley asked the customer. "Sure. But do you mind if I bring along my lunch? I don't want it to get cold while I wait."
With the customer sitting in the driver's seat, Dudley worked under the dash with his test light. He methodically wiggled and probed the various connectors to find the problem. The "Power-upper' provided the electricity for Dudley to use to check the circuit and his test light showed that electrical energy was getting to the radio just fine. The customer was sitting there eating a Big Mac when Dudley happened to probe a bright yellow connector.
Suddenly, there was a loud explosion. The customer’s head was immediately encapsulated in a huge beach ball. The Big Mac splatted everywhere covering the customer's face with pieces of the Big Mac—giving him an instant hamburger facial.
Bits of catsup, mayonnaise, and lettuce were hanging from his eyebrows. Part of the hamburger had been crammed into the customer's mouth making him look like he had the mumps. He had no idea what had hit him and sat there wondering, "What the hell did they put in this hamburger!?!"
Dudley was in big trouble. All the men in the repair bays came running over to see what had happened. When they saw the customer with the Big Mac splattered on his face, they started to laugh. Through the ringing in his ears Dudley could hear the howls of laughter as he climbed out from under the dash.
The men were holding their sides and falling on the ground in hysterics. Then one of mechanics started clapping and shouted "Do it again, Dudley. Do it again!" The others immediately joined in with the chant. From that day on, Dudley had a new nickname:
"Do it again Dudley."
